by Marc Gunn, around 1992

I was listening to a lot of “Weird Al” Yankovic when I wrote this song. You will note there is nothing about reflexology in the song. That's because after writing the lyrics on a sheet of paper, I was watching TV and saw a feature on reflexology. It sounded interesting so I wrote it on the paper. The name sorta stuck.

I hurt you. I'm sorry.
But the fault isn't all mine
What am I to do when you break my autoharp
Across my spine.

We were in love. You knew
This love was true.
But your jealousy was so bad
You broke us, my autoharp, and my back in two.

I'll take you back into my arms
My darling, I'll forgive you
If you'd only stop this jealousy
And if only I could move.

Paralyzed from the neck down,
Don't worry. There's no pain.
If you'd only come back to be my love
Since I'll never play again.

I'll take you back to be my love
My darling, I'll forgive you.
But if you won't come back into my arms.
Then get ready for one helluva a law suit.